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close your eyes

I remember my parents used to always tell me the night before Christmas: “the faster you fall asleep- the sooner Santa will come!” And so I closed my eyes and tomorrow came. But what I didn’t realize was every time I closed my eyes I was getting older and older.

I remember still tasting his chapstick as I walked away from my first kiss. I don’t remember closing my eyes. But I think I remember knowing I was supposed to close them so I could feel something.

I remember my brother and I used burry our faces behind our hands in the dark movie theaters to hide from the scary scenes. And so we closed our eyes and all of the scary disappeared. But if you think about it… the scary is never actually gone.

I remember telling you once, while I was away- “Everything reminds me of you…” And you told me… “Just close your eyes.” But what I didn’t tell you was that when I close my eyes… that’s when I remember you the most.

I remember lying across from you, watching your eyes grow tired and your heart resting easy. I remember looking at you until I let it hurt too much. And I remember closing my eyes the second you opened yours- afraid you’d see how bad I loved you. But I think you knew… even with my eyes closed. I think you knew how much it killed me, missing you while we were asleep.

The prompt told me: “close your eyes” But what I want to tell you is- Stay awake- stay up late, keep your eyes open- you might feel younger longer. Open your eyes when they kiss you, and watch their passion. Choose to see your own reality… The world doesn’t actually disappear when you choose to not see a thing. Choose to keep your eyes open when the world reminds you of someone. It does no good to ignore your heart. And keep staring. Allow them to see your love- no matter how bad it hurts to feel so much.

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